Hi loves. So, I am still jobless. But I’ve sent out a ton of applications last week so I’m hoping I get some hopeful prospects soon. I can’t count on it though. This is tough, but I’m handling it as best I can.
I’ve been wanting to write a post about my plans to take my life back from depression. Depression has utterly robbed me the past few years, but Abilify has been helping me immensely. I haven’t been sleeping nearly as much, I’ve had much more motivation, and I’ve been interested in things again. I’ve been reading poetry again, playing the piano again, and am more optimistic about making friends in the future.
So, here are my “plans”:
- Start seeing a therapist
- Get a gym membership again, with my husband
- Take voice lessons, which I haven’t done since early college; then find a singing group to join. Voila! A social hobby!
So, yeah, that’s only three things. Therapist, gym, singing.
Here’s the problem, though. I really need a job in order to pay for the therapist and voice lessons. My husband will pay for the gym, and we’re planning to start that in just a few days at the beginning of November. But I can’t have him pay for my therapist and voice lessons! We have quite a few large costs coming up in November. We have to renew our renter’s insurance, I have to start paying off my student loans for that semester of grad school, we both have somewhat large credit card bills that need paying, and something else I don’t remember. Anyway, November seems to not be the optimal month to start paying for extra self-care things. Unless I do land a good job! Even so, I can wait until December to start therapy and voice lessons. Fortunately, even without Abilify, winter doesn’t scare me like it does other people. I don’t think my depression is seasonal at all. I enjoy the dark, because I can use my lamps more.