April 1st – Time to Review the Past Six Months

Fall 2014 was a fluke. I went through some depressive episodes, but I was on an extremely promising track to a better sense of self. October was my best month. My plan for self-therapy was going great. November was pretty good too, but started to see some more depression. December started out really well, but a massive decline happened. By mid to late December, I felt angry more often than I felt happy, and I got off course from the self-therapy plan I made for myself in September. My self-expression at work was getting out of hand. Then in January, in a way, I shut down. I kept hitting walls with my creativity, and my erratic behavior reflected my frustration. I didn’t begin recovery until late February. Before that, most of what I felt was depression about world suffering. All the Islamic terrorism was predominantly occupying my mind. Then I saw the magnificent Birdman and found something positive to reflect on. I started watching more movies and forming thoughts about them. I was very interested in the Academy Awards and in reading all the backlash on the Internet (plus defending the Birdman win over Boyhood). March went by so fast, but I saw the semblance of an October-esque groove. I realized that I had lost what I had been working towards in the fall, and tried to find some of it again. It is thanks to my blog posts that I can take inventory of my progress or my backwards steps. At least I am aware that I need to get my focus back.

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